Looks can be deceiving ....

Often enough we judge people, places and things by the way they look. If this doesn't apply to you well then good for you. But if this idea does apply to you do you ever just wonder if people judge you the same way and it bothers you because unless you're a mind reader how are you supposed to know what that person is thinking?

One of my coworkers laughs at me all the time and she literally thinks it's adorable how I have all these thoughts and beliefs about people. She told me to give it a few years and the thought would go away. Today she was joking with me and said I was shallow but she later said that I'm honestly too young to be shallow.  She said that with time the things I wanted would be different, "see now you want a buff guy with an eight pack but when you're older you'll want a guy with a nice 401 k".  She has made it her life's mission to set me up with someone. But when I do judge people I really do feel bad sometimes. Looks can be deceiving just because someone looks like a 10 does not make them a good person at all.  Their personality is also a factor.  

I have another question for you. Do you ever just feel like everyone around you is in a relationship but you are the only single one? That's probably not true but hey it happens. Also we've discovered that I can't tell the difference between flirting and just talking to someone. When you don't have experience in that area it all sounds the same. I'm such a dork it's ridiculous. Now when it comes to crushes I like to shoot for the stars. I'll have a crush on someone I know I'll never have a chance with and that's just  how I like it.  It's strange and maybe it makes me shallow but it's just how I currently see things.

If you used to know me you need to know this now. I am way more confident than I was before. I've done things in the past few weeks that have even surprised myself. Before if you would have walked past me I would have just ignored you but now I say hello. I'm not afraid to talk and I'm not afraid to be myself. Confidence is key and I'm not tolerating mediocrity and or bull. Funny, it's like a lot of my post are about relationships and I know nothing about them.

Hopefully my next post will make much more sense.

xoxo
Mercedes. 

Something about feelings.

When someone makes you the happiest person and the saddest person at the same time, that's when it's real. That's when it’s worth something.
— Chuck Bass (@ltsChuck) May 7, 2014

Have you ever met someone and it's like all of a sudden nothing else matters? Like those moments your with them just feel so fantastic that all the bad things in your world just disappear. I picked the tweet above to share because hey, it's Chuck Bass and because it just feels incredibly true. In life I feel like things that are the most worth it are the things that are challenging and difficult. Like right now writing this blog post is challenging because I have a bunch of things on my mind that I want to say but the backspace button seems to be getting a workout. But who knows this post might actually be worth it.

I hate watching movies where  a character ends up with a happy ending even though they didn't really deserve it. Like no where in the storyline do they even attempt to try and in the end they turn out to be the hero or they have a passionate kiss with the so called love of their life. To me that's boring! Where's the excitement, the drama, the tear jerking moments that  actually mean something?I honestly like movies that make me cry because that means I had to have felt something. In the end I think everyone just wants to feel something. Even if that something is pain.

Recently I did meet someone who may have changed my life a little bit, maybe more than that. Not only did they help me learn more about myself but they also made me feel really happy. But what really got me is the fact that I don't think this person really realized how truly amazing they are. I'm not huge on talking but when I do talk it's with someone that I like. But when I'm not talking, I'm observing because I like to watch the little things that people do. Sometimes cute little things people do naturally are the things that make them stand out the most. When people point out your flaws or say negative things about you, it's easy to get stuck those ideas. To think that no one would ever really get to see the real you because all they can see are those negative things. I feel like when someone makes you happy those "flaws" don't matter they just make that person ten times better. With me I have the hardest time showing affection and or sharing my feeling because I'm so afraid that when people discover the real me, they'll realize I'm bad for them. So I've spent a lot of my time pushing people that I actually like away, or I just don't let them in.I But that's my fault and I want to change it. If I keep hiding behind this fear that no one will ever like me if they get to know me, no one is ever going to like me because I won't let them. I just want people to be happy, thats ll that matters to me.

Maybe that's why I don't like movies with a happy ending, because I 'm afraid I'll never get one of my own.

The Future...

So plain and simple: The future is scary. I'd like to say otherwise and be all wide eyed and optimistic but I can't because it scares me. Anything can happen and nothing is guaranteed and honestly you just don't know what you're going to get.  People say that they can't wait until the future for things to happen, but the future is now and things don't just happen, you have to make them happen.

You can't just live life scared to go outside your bubble because you it's not guaranteed that you'll stay safe. On the other hand living impulse by impulse might just leave you sixteen and pregnant or I don’t know dead. Where's the happy medium? It's so sad when that person who has worked their butt off their whole life and then when they decide to have a little fun something bad happens. It's even more frustrating when that person who has done every impulsive act imaginable, nothing bad ever happens to them. It's like there are rules and exceptions to those rules and then you're just left wondering where you fit in to it all. Life I tell you is just a complicated thing, and it really hasn't even started yet.

Every birthday since I turned thirteen I want to say my parents have told me that I'm one year closer to being tried as an adult. I know that sounds really depressing and also looks like they think the worst of me but honestly, they were being realistic. It only takes one stupid mistake nowadays to get yourself in trouble and you have to be aware of what you’re doing. Like when you get your driver's license it's the most exciting thing in the world, no more waiting for your parents to pick you up. But every time you get behind the wheel you have to know that you could be putting other people in harm’s way if you don't pay attention. It's so stressful knowing that something that can be so fun can be dangerous as well. Sometimes I wish my future self would send me text messages of what not to do because I really don't want to mess up. Like you never know when that important English essay you have is just going to delete itself the night before it's due.

Whenever I think about the future, I think about the show One Tree Hill. It has nine seasons and with every season you just never know what’s going to happen.  My favorite characters from that show are Nathan Scott and Haley; they’re this couple that goes through so many different hardships that you just don’t think will make it in the end. Watching the show makes you realize there is no age limit you have to be to fall in love or become successful, you can get all that by going after what you want. I watch these characters grow and become better versions of themselves and I just wish that I can do the same. The point is, you never know what's going to happen, whether it’s falling in love and getting married at seventeen or being your own boss by the age of twenty two, anything can happen.

Sometimes I just wonder how my grandparents made it this far in life because it just seems like so much. But you know I might be scared but I'm also not afraid of going through life. I know that things are going to happen and many of them might suck, but there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Why I am totally dateable…

In journalism we were told to write a persuasive article about any topic. My friend and I were joking around about what to write so I decided to write a fake article . Who writes fake articles? Lame people who have no life, but whatever. Here is what I came up with.:

Why I am totally date-able…



Did you know that in the world of high-school dating, freshman girls and senior boys have the highest chances of successfully getting together? But their relationship usually treads between the borders of good and just plain creepy.  If you didn’t already know that, I’m guessing you can look around your school hallways and find the girls that are usually called “baby hoes”, just know they didn’t get those names because of their kind hearts. So why is it, that many senior girls are often single? One website claims it’s because they’re “picky” and won’t give certain people a chance. Yeah, that’s probably true because after four years of dealing with the same guys, they probably just know what they want in a relationship. After being taught over and over again that boys just want sex and that’s all they want, it’s amazing that girls still date. But thinking about it that's not really true because, girls think about sex just like any guy except they will probably lie about it or freak out that you asked them that sort of question. Besides, if you don’t feel comfortable enough talking about sex, you most likely shouldn’t be having it in the first place.

Chances are that if you are reading this you are probably single. Well guess what so am I, and have been for the past seventeen years. So instead of letting an opportunity go by, I’m just going to tell you why I am totally date-able. Sadly I don’t think saying “because I’m awesome,” will be convincing enough and it makes it sound like I think too highly of myself. On a serious note, I’m not really a mean person and I don’t have a “type”.  So maybe I do have a “type”, but let’s just say you fit it. Now sometimes music choices can make or break a relationship, but I don’t really care what you listen to as long as your little heart is happy. If you want to listen to Taylor Swift be my guest. But  I really don’t hate on people’s music choices but I just don’t understand many of them, if you listen to Selena Gomez though you’re winning.I'll pretty much listen to anything because I like giving songs a chance before I decide I absolutely hate them.  I’ll sing with you, really I’m a bad singer, but in the end I’m willing to look stupid as long as it’s fun. I enjoy horror movies, and by enjoy I mean I like hiding behind pillows and  jumping from my seat when things happen. So at least if we watch one together you can get a good laugh because my reactions are pretty hilarious. I’m really honest, if you do something stupid, chances are I’m going to tell you and not to make you feel dumb either. AlsoI like being right, but I don’t mind being wrong, I’m not going to explode with anger if you know something I don’t. Just don’t question my intelligence and I won’t question yours.               

My personality type is type B, which means I’m pretty relaxed and easy going so at least you know I’m not going to freak out at a drop of a dime. I’m kind of a mix between type A and B, but I think being angry and holding grudges is a waste of time.  I’m a runner, if that says something, it says it all. I put in a lot of energy to run, which is why I really don’t get into fights and I stay pretty relaxed.  Also I like to work out and being healthy and I am not one of those girls who complain about their weight. If you think I’m not skinny enough, tough luck kid, go date a toothpick.  If you decide I’m worth dating, just know I do like sarcasm but I limit it so you know how I really feel. But I like discussions and debates, on simple things. I don’t talk politics and I really don’t discriminate against other people’s religious views. I like to read, which means I have patience and I’m pretty committed, but maybe reading has nothing to do with either of those things. If you like reading we can have discussions about books! Even though that sounds really lame, and would probably make us losers.  I’m not afraid to say what’s on my mind or what I’m feeling, in fact if we’re going to be losers , we will be the most amazing losers in the world.  I’d do anything for the people I care about, and chances are, if we’re dating I probably would have to like you at least a little bit. I'm a really, really good listener.  If you called me in the middle of the night or the middle of the day saying you needed someone to talk to I’d answer, always. If you needed a person to lean on I’d be over in a minute. Just know I can only bench press seventy five pounds so don’t expect to be throwing all of your weight at me...but I would be there.

I’m a girl, so chances are you think all girls have some crazy freak bipolar tendencies, and I’m here to tell you that that is sometimes true. I like to keep my emotions plain and simple and I don’t need to act sad to get people’s attention. Ask me what’s wrong and I’ll tell you. If I say something like, “I don’t want to talk about it,” that damn right means “I really want to talk about it and for you to listen, but I don’t want you to think I’m annoying.” I don’t do leading people on, that crap gets old and after a while even little kids stop chasing butterflies. I really like laughing and I enjoy making other people laugh, but I really don't consider myself funny at all. If you laugh it’s usually when I’m not trying and my favorite thing to see is a smile on someone’s face. If you’re smiling like a creep though, we might need to talk.

There are many things a person can fear, I’m probably scared of a 101 things but you’ll never know what they are unless you ask. If you ask me for my number that’s like a guaranteed yes, because you asked and the only other guy who has asked me was like my coaches son. I’m a pretty good multi-tasking, I wrote this while I was working on my English homework, aren’t I cool?  You know how when you meet someone, something about them can just stand out and you know you like them? Well the first thing I notice about a person is their smile and their eyes. I like guys who aren’t afraid to show emotion and I just like happy people. But, rarely will I ever mention to a guy that they have nice eyes, and if I do I’m either on some weird medication, or I like that person. It really doesn’t matter what color eyes you have, although I have a favorite. I hope my personality makes up for brown eyes because let’s face it, they’re basic.

Drama is pretty pointless, and I don’t even like to go near it. I wouldn’t even take the class. Sure after watching Mean Girls, I kind of wish I could see that type of drama but no, I don’t even want to be a part of it. It get's annoying when other people get involved in personal things and that is something I don't have patience for.

They are probably many different reasons that I’m date-able, but I’m trying not to sound too pretentious. But I hope you found what I had to say at least a little bit interesting. This probably wasn't proof read.  I try not to bore people to death, sorry but I’m not sorry if I did.

Shit Girls Say

Lol XD I can't even function right now, funny laughs that I needed. 

Are you looking at me?

Do you ever just find yourself in  a situation where everyone is staring at you? Like why on earth would they be staring? Whenever someone stares at me I think of every possible thing in my head that they could possibly be staring at and freak out. I hate feeling like people are judging me, I know they do but I don't really want to feel them judging me. They say when you stare at a monkey, it goes crazy. I think I'm the monkey in this situation. I read once that in France people stare at other people openly to admire their beauty and it isn't considered creepy or rude. But I don't care who you are if you stare at me, I'm usually sending death threats in my head.

Imagine this: you see your crush and of course they look cute as always. You're just admiring the way they look, because anybody you have a crush on has got to be hot... Not realizing you're practically drooling, not cute by the way, when your crush turns and catches you staring. I'm going to tell you now that there are different types of staring and unless you want it to be super obvious that you like this person you better be discreet.  I mean there is  a difference between staring at a guy friend and staring at a guy you want to date.

I really should apologize in advance for the staring that I do, because I stare a lot.... Even if I'm not actually staring at you, it happens. I'll go from staring at an attractive guy, to staring at someone's shoe, to staring at my friends hair, to staring at someone's shirt. I even stare at the ceiling which confuses many people but I guess I find the answers to everything up there. But I always, always look at someone when they are talking to me or I'm talking to them. If I can look you in the eye you can do the same.

I absolutely cannot stand when people wear their freaking sunglasses inside a building. Like is that really necessary? Does it make you feel cool or something? I used to think it was stupid when teachers told students to take them off inside the classroom, well now I understand why. If you wear sunglasses inside there's about a strong chance I'm judging you. I could tolerate a medical condition, and maybe a couple times where you just "forgot" to take them off. But if you do it consistently, it's ridiculous. I can't tell if you're staring at me or the poster behind me, and then I'm just not sure whether to acknowledge you or ignore you without being rude. Does looking at someone while wearing sunglasses inside make you feel powsrful or something. Because it just pisses me off.

I just love it when a teacher stares at you expecting you to know the answer, hey I can stare back so this might last a while.  Do you ever just feel like staring contests can definitely be in your favor? I suck at them but against the right people they work for me. But hey if a guy has really gorgeous eyes, I have no problem staring back, unless they are like way to intense that it's scary. Those moments when you accidentally glance up, making eye contact with someone you don't like, I hate those.

Sorry about my random little rant, I hope you enjoyed it.