Fears and Insecurities

What's your biggest fear, is it knowing that people might actually see the real you? How many times have you gone back inside you house to change an outfit or a hairstyle because you felt like it wasn't good enough?  Once? Twice? How many times have you done something different just to impress someone and they still didn't notice a thing?

Let's start with a word:

Insecure:

1.

(of a person) not confident or assured; uncertain and anxious.

So let's say being insecure is natural because hey, nobody's perfect but people still strive to be perfect.  Sometimes for themselves and sometimes for someone else. You see I would have never really thought to write something about insecurities because I wouldn't want people looking for all of mine. But one of my friends told me I should talk about them. It's funny because out of all the people I know she would never strike me as someone who is insecure. If fact, after many hilarious conversations I wish I could have recorded, she definitely is not. 

Here is a fun little question, How many times have you taken like fifty pictures of yourself and then decided they weren't good enough because of this or that? Think about it, I can randomly delete all the photos on my phone and not worry about, because they were all selfies no one was ever going to see. It's not the fact that I enjoy taking pictures of myself, okay the stupid ones yeah, I can just never take the perfect picture. There are people who post pictures just so they can have attention brought to themselves, and I give them props because I couldn't do it.

One thing that used to piss me so much, was listening to girls complain and complain about their weight. Most of them weren't even close to fat, so I basically decided they were conceited, stuck up brats who only cared about the way they looked. But they weren't, they were just insecure because they felt their weight was a flaw that people would judge them about.  Think about the movie Mean Girls, and if you say you've never watched it before, please let me punch you in the face. Anyways The Plastics were all just  insecure mean girls who wanted everyone to believe that they were perfect. Regina was concerned with her weight so that made it easy for Cady to manipulate her. Cady was insecure about her intelligence so she started acting stupid to get Aaron to tutor her, only to find out later that he liked her better when she was herself. Gretchen just felt like she had to be apart of something so she did end up joining the "cool asians." Even the the movie was very sexual, funny, and filled with backstabbing it did teach a really good lesson. I mean on Wednesdays we wear pink, some people just want to be apart of something.

It's really easy to feel insecure, I said in another post before, that when people stare at me I just think about every flaw they could be seeing. Maybe it's because I can't read minds, but I sure as hell would love to know why people stare at me. Insecurities kind of go hand in hand with fears, because most of the time you're afraid that people will find out the things that make you insecure.

But honestly everyone is beautiful.